Hi, Yesterday was my birthday. Let me say I wasn't celebrating turning 29 again.
Lately I have been very sick and depressed which was caused by my ailment.
Some of you know that I had been a cigarette smoker. After going to the Palmetto Event last year I had to see my doctor for my yearly physical. While seeing him I had asked him if there was anything new on the market to help me get off the cigarettes. Mind you I have been smoking since I was fourteen years old. He told me about Chantix and I started taking the medication.
Anyhow...I don't know what happened but two and a half weeks ago all of the sudden I was very sick to my stomach and I mean sick. I don't think I have ever been so sick to my stomach plus I was vomiting. This was all day long for over a week I was going through this. I couldn't eat and the thought of food was making me sick. Then came the sleeplessness. I couldn't get to sleep to save my life. So what ended up happening was I was getting sleep deprived. And this went on for days. This then lead me to being depressed. I was throwing things out thinking I don't need them anymore. I got my hair choppped thinking that a new me would help with the depression I was crying all the time...and I mean all the time and I couldn't stop. I was exhausted. I was a real mess. I just wanted to die. My birthday was coming...UGH...another year older....my baby turned 21 so I was like...my kids no longer need me...and I was just a mess.
I finally called the doctor. It was either that or do something stupid for I had no control over my emotions at all. I went to the doctors and I could have watered all of his plant in the office for him from all the crying I did. He prescribed for me Ambien. Well....it helped me go to sleep which the doctor thought was what I needed ...( Well actually he also wanted me on an antianxiety medication too...but I told him I didn't want drugs to mess up my head more) anyhow...the Ambien didn't really help. I got to sleep but was then awake again in an hour or two and couldn't not go back to sleep. I went through this for a couple more days...and ended up even more tired and depressed. I didn't want to tat, knit or anything. I still couldn't eat...and I was just not me...and I was still crying all the time.
So there I was ....on the phone again to my doctor crying telling him...I need help. The sleeping pills were not working...so he told me he really wanted me on the antianxiety medication. So now I am on Zanax. But I am really going to try and not depend on taking it and end up addicted to it. I was addicted to cigarettes...which I have to say...I am no longer a smoker. Chantix did help me kick the smoking addiction but messed me up in the end.
I am still not quite myself...but I am better. At least I am not watering all my house plants right now. And I am not throwing things away because I don't have long to do anything anyways. This was all depression talking. Don't worry though...I didn't throw all my tatting and bobbinlace and knitting books out the door. But I did get rid a lot of stuff and I would have gotten rid of alot more if I had a car to take the stuff to.
So that is what is new with me. I know I have things to proof for people and I hope I can get back to tatting later on this week and get things finished.
Now for my birthday....which was yesterday.
I got a real nice package in the mail from an Irish Friend Pamela Myers from Ireland. She actually sent to me a Leprechaun that she made for me. He is so very cute...and oh the Beanie Bear is also so very cute. I love it. Pam still has to send me an email with the cute Leprechaun's name yet...I don't know what to call him and he is being silent and just smiling that cute smile at me...with those devilish eyes that twinkle.....LOL And as you can see he is guarding my chocolate coins that are in the purse he is sitting on ....
And the card she sent to me. Tatted Shamrocks and flowers on the front of it. You know when I was in Dublin, Ireland years ago one of the neatest things I saw was the street lights that had shamrocks as part of the fixture. I thought they were the coolest thing. Sometime I will put a picture of one of the street light here on my blog for you to see. I don't know about where you live but around here...we have just plain street lights. Nothing fancy about them whatsoever.
I also have a green bag she sent to me that has chocolate in it. I love the package she sent to me and it arrived to me right on my birthday. Pam had told me someone was going to come and visit me but probably not on my birthday...but he did come right on my birthday. Thank you you much Pam for everything you sent to me.
My husband got me some of the flowers in my Donegal Parian China Vase ( Made in Ballyshannon Co. Donegal, Ireland this was a gift from one of my girls for my birthday a different year0 that you see here. Some of hte flowers my daughter Michelle had also got for me when I was not myself. She got them I think to try and cheer me up. My daughter Chrystal got me a new Celtic Music CD for as she put it....I know you love Celtic Music...and it was called Celtic Spirit so she thought it would cheer me up. My daughter Chrystal also got me this very cool looking barette. When I told her on the phone I got my hair chopped she was like...how short did you get it cut....I think she had already bought the barette and was afraid I wouldn't be able to wear it. Well...just to let you all know...I didn't get all my hair cut...but it is alot shorter than it was. I got a shag hair cut so it is multi-layered now.
My daughter Michelle got me a beautiful bed set for my bed. Satiny, silk comforter and pillow shams and bed skirting. IT all looks so very nice on my bed. It is actually more purple looking than these pictures show...but you can get the idea of how silky satiny it all looks. Very pretty. Now I need to get a couple pillows to put in the pillow shams.